Yes, I am obsessed with CrossFit

Tuesday 26 March 2013

50 Signs You're Obsessed with CrossFit

1. At any point in the day, if you're not thinking about CrossFit then you're thinking about coffee or bacon.

2. You use the royal 'we' when talking about CrossFit. 'We don't use machines; we are the machines.

3. When life hands you lemons, you squat. Squats make everything better. And if squats don't, bacon will.

4. You believe that active recovery can = WOD. The clue is in the name. Active recovery.

5. Your friends have a code word they use frequently to signal you’re talking about CrossFit to much. Again.

6. You don't laugh at snatch jokes anymore.

7. You wear Reebok Nano’s outside of the gym.

8. The posts on your Facebook timeline look something like this: CrossFit CrossFit CrossFit CrossFit CrossFit.

9. Your internet browsing history looks something like this: CrossFit CrossFit CrossFit CrossFit CrossFit.

10. A missed lift keeps you up at night. You can’t stop thinking about it like you need to get back to the gym and try again right now. You know you got this.

11. You don't go to any social event unless its paleo and ends by 8.30pm. You need sleep. You have CrossFit tomorrow.

12. You Google restaurant venues ahead of time to figure out how you’re gonna dissect the menu for paleo options.

13. Everybody you know, knows you CrossFit. Everyone. Like your name and CrossFit are synonyms.

14. You wear v-neck shirts even when you have clavicle bruises. You earned those bruises and you wear them proudly.

15. You already requested vacation days at work July 22-28th. Even though tickets for this year’s CrossFit Games aren't released yet, you already know you're going.

16. You become instantly outraged at any suggestion that CrossFit is a cult. “... but it's a good cult.”

17. You've known the people at your new box for only 2 months, yet already they understand you better than your life long, non CrossFitting friends.

18. There's someone at work who doesn't know your name, or what your job is, but they know that you CrossFit.

19. You wake up sore and wonder if you actually acted out that 1RM snatch dream in your sleep last night.

20. CrossFit doesn't fit around your schedule; your schedule fits around CrossFit. CrossFit is your schedule.

21. If it’s Reebok CrossFit you have to have it. Yes you have it in black, grey, green, yellow and blue but this one is different. It's red.

22. You carry 2-3 pairs of shoes at any one time in your gym bag.

23. You won't spend $30 on sunday brunch – waste of money when you have eggs at home. But, you'll spend $139 on custom nanos, $289 at Lululemon, $120 on Progenex, $40 on a foam roller, $80 on shorts and $30 on socks branded with CrossFit.

24. You’re genuinely sorry you can't go out tonight for your friend’s birthday drinks, but its Wednesday. 13.4 is announced tonight, and it’s not the same if you don’t watch it live.

25. Bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon

26. The next person to refer to CrossFit as bootcamp is going to witness something extrordinarily unique…

27. Your computer password is ‘CrossFit’, ‘burpees’, ‘snatchin’ or ‘321go’.

28. You check the WOD even on rest days. You know...just in case.

29. “It's a lifestyle, not a workout.”

30. Date night. If they CrossFit – great. You’ll talk about CrossFit all night. If they don’t, heck, who cares you’re just gonna talk about CrossFit all night anyway.

31. You’ll decline a Friday night invitation to happy hour with friends, but a last minute CrossFit social? You’re In!

32. Snow storm approaching...torch - check, food - check, ab mat - check, kettle bell - check, print out at home WODs - check. You will not be defeated by a bit of snow. Bring it on storm troopers.

33. Your New Year’s resolution was to mobilize more.

34. Every song on the radio reminds you of “this one time…at CrossFit”

35. “Sorry, I can't go out tonight, I have a CrossFit competition in 38 weeks...I gotta get some rest”

36. You've done a handstand or a pistol anywhere other than the gym so that someone can snap a pic.

37. You hate burpees. Like really hate burpees. Really really intensely dislike burpees. Except you love them.

38. You’ve taken your shirt off after 2 push ups.

39. You find double unders are the most frustrating thing on the earth. Until you get them. Then they’re just all about timing.

40. Progenex is your favorite meal of the day. It’s like a cheat meal.

41. "Hold the bread, the dressing, the cheese, the croutons and the beans. Extra bacon please."

42. Your package from Rogue arrived. OMG. You have to get home right away.

43. You have 7 LAX balls at home but have never played LAX in your life

44. Can't walk past a park bench without banging out a few box jumps. Or a fire hydrant without trying to balance a pistol on top.

45. Chalk, new outfits and tape make you stronger. (No, really they actually make you stronger.)

46. 100lbs is light weight. LIGHTWEIGHT baby!!!

47. Massage is no longer a luxury it's a necessity.

48. "RWARRRR!!" is actually a word in your vocabulary.

49. You just shopped self service in IKEA...LIKE A BOSS. #yeahyoudid.

50. You might not have that muscle up yet. But one day you will. And you will NOT be stopped.

Monday 25 March 2013

The 10 Commandments of CrossFit

Thou shall respect and listen to the coach;
Thou shall not think they are all that and check thy ego at the door;
Thou shall not Zumba;
Thou shall not WOD on rest days;
Thou shall keep thy mouth shut during WOD briefing unless thy has something constructive to say;
Thou shall not kill thyself on the first round. Thy knows better;
Thou shall not perform shoddy reps, only awesome ones;
Thou shall not steal Zico from the fridge;
Thou shall not stare at thy neighbors bar in envy;
Thou shall not falsify thy 1RM to thy non CrossFitting friends.

Amen to that.

Thursday 21 March 2013

Showtime

Show up.

Don’t just rock up.

Don’t just be there.

Don’t just stop by.

Show up.

Showing up means to be present. To be in the moment. To be on time. To listen. To care. To smile. To risk feeling silly. To be tired but doing it anyway. To be afraid and doing it anyway. To perform. To walk 6 blocks in the snow to get there. To want it bad enough that it’s worth it. To find 10 minutes after class to practice your pistols. To go for it. To give support. To help. To show up on heavy thruster days. To know heavy thrusters suck but you need the practice. To not only show up once and expect results. To show up again.

To know that no matter who you are, no matter what your 'eliteness' and no matter what your goal, the first step is always the same.

Everyone starts somewhere every single day. And everyone’s somewhere is showing up.

Monday 18 March 2013

Gone Bonkers?

Wait a minute…

7 minute work outs at 5am;

Fran dreams;

Bruising;

The worst DOMS of your life, all day every day;

Calluses;

Vomit;

Thrusters;

BURPEES!

$200/month.

Have we gone mad?

Are we all completely and utterly stark raving bonkers?

Probably.

But I heard that all the best people are.

Sunday 10 March 2013

Have a word

It's true that the body will only achieve what the mind believes it can.

Get your shit together

Find ‘that place’

Have a word

Then

Pick up the damn bar and shove it over your head.

Friday 8 March 2013

Reps That Give CrossFit a Bad Rep

Ugly Reps

Shallow squats, stripper deadlifts, wormy presses and…well…let’s just call them ’CrossFit’ snatches. Half reps, cheated reps, lazy reps and no reps.

It's ugly, and it doesn't count.

Stupid Reps

When the RX for high rep WOD is your 1RM, then attempting to throw that over your head 30 times is not big or clever. It’s stupid.

There's a difference between training and testing and smart athletes know what that is.

Forced Reps

Throwing around heavy barbells without adherence to the body’s signals is begging for trouble.

There’s a fine line between productive commitment and self-destructive adherence. The body will tell you exactly where that line is. Listen to it.

Whilst athletes allow all this craziness to continue, then it’s no wonder CrossFit gets a bad rep.

CrossFit is a beautiful, skillful and exciting sport which unadulterated, is 100% awesome.

There’s simply only one defense, for which every single athlete is accountable for.

More awesomeness.

Tuesday 5 March 2013

Cheap & Easy

Talk, knowledge, positivity, motivation, support, consistency, preparation…

Cheap & easy.

All of it.

It’s so easy to say you’re gonna do it, to believe you can do it, to get yourself all revved up with motivation, buy all the gear and watch a ton of videos on you tube.

Cheap & easy like a microwave TV dinner.

All the gear, the talk, the knowledge, the motivational mantras, the good intentions, the promises, the commitment… mean nothing unless you do something with it.

You have to take responsibility for the realization of your goal.

Man up and get shit done.

There is only one secret to success.

It only works if you do.

Monday 4 March 2013

Spotlight: Coach Tony Reishus, CrossFit Alaska

Name: Tony Reishus
Affiliate: Crossfit Alaska
Years as a Coach: 10 years strength & conditioning, 5 years CrossFit
Favorite CrossFit movement: Clean
Favorite song to WOD to: Lunatic Fringe by Red Rider
Fran Time: 3:21
Most recent PR: 245 lb squat snatch
Last cheated on a WOD: Never.

What inspired you to become a CrossFit coach?
I went to college to become a strength and conditioning coach - I love training motivated athletes. 5 years ago I opened an athlete training center, I was doing CrossFit myself so I decided to affiliate; the rest is history.

What has been your best coaching experience so far?

Using CrossFit alongside traditional strength and conditioning to help numerous athletes reach their goal of college athletics.

If ‘TONY’ was a WOD, what would it be?

It would have to be heavy and hard of course!

30 clean and jerks at 225 lb,
1,000 ft elevation on mountain top to bottom
50 weighted pull-ups at 1.5 pood for time

What's your biggest goat and what are you doing about it?

I have trouble getting to my ideal competing weight of 220-225 lb by the Open, which is following the heart of winter up here. Our winters are dark and cold, which is very conducive to weight gain, thus making dieting difficult; did I mention I love food. This year I have gotten a jump on lowering my caloric intake and by the Open I should be at my ideal weight. Squat snatching is my lifting goat due to an old injury, this year I have put quite a bit more focus into getting stronger on it in particular.

Tell us about the community at CrossFit Alaska

Our community is great and very diverse. We have high school and college athletes, CrossFit specific athletes, recreational CrossFitters and both young and old using CrossFit as their primary mode of fitness.

Do you have any success stories amongst your athletes you’d like to share?

One of my favorites involves a hard working young football player that didn't start or play very much as a junior in high school, with a lot of hard work he was a starting linebacker and full back his senior year and was named first team all-conference.

What’s the most common mistake you see amongst new athletes at your affiliate?

Not trusting the trainers advice concerning form, efficiency, and load suggestion.

If you could give someone new to CrossFit just one piece of advice, what would it be?

Get hooked up with a good trainer/gym right away, and do your research in picking the right facility.

What was your last cheat meal and on a scale of 1 to 10 how good was it?

It was Mexican food and a margarita followed by an ice cream twix bar. Mexican food and margarita were an 8, twix bar was a 10!

Would you share with us your favorite tip or cue that we might find useful to use in our training?

I can't think of a great cue, but I will give some more advice: Get strong, have confidence, be realistic, learn different paces for different wods, develop a game plan for each wod, and keep up on mobility and recovery/rest.

Find out more:
(w) www.revolutionsportstraining.com/CrossFit
(t) 907-277-2348
(e) info@revolutionsportstraining.com
FB: CrossFit Alaska

Friday 1 March 2013

Girl Talk

Flat stomachs, diet pills, thigh gaps, ultimate goal weights, lemonade diets, thinspiration, 500 calories a day, 2 hours on the treadmill, an hour of zumba and back to back express abs.

Boring.

It’s ironic that the woman you strive so hard to be, the woman you envision as the pinnacle of health and fitness is actually, more likely to be exactly the opposite. Most likely following an unhealthy, regimen of dramatic restriction techniques and over training to reach a weight or figure she has a slim chance of maintaining.

Get a life.

F*ck your thigh gap and your skinny jeans.

Let’s talk about performance. Let’s talk about how strong we are.

Let’s eat some bacon and eggs, and talk about the amazing things our body can do.

Now we're talking...

Tuesday 26 February 2013

Spotlight: Coach Kyle Haas, Anderson River CrossFit

Name: Kyle Haas
Affiliate: Anderson River CrossFit, CA
Years as a CrossFit Coach: 1
Favorite CrossFit movement: Wall Ball Shots
Fran Time: 2:53
Most recent PR: Isabel 2:48
Bacon preference: Crispy
CrossFit alter ego: Pukie the Clown
Favorite song to WOD to: Take Me Home Tonight (Eddie Money)

What inspired you to become a CrossFit coach?

I was a teacher when I started CrossFit so I always had a love for teaching others. I felt such a passion about CrossFit, I felt I needed to transition my teachings to its exercise methods. Once I transitioned from the teaching world to the CrossFit world I knew I found my calling.

What has been your best coaching experience so far?

Seeing people do things they never thought were possible. People walk in who can’t run 400M without stopping and then end up being able to run a mile within a few months.

Tell us about the community at Anderson River CrossFit

We dedicate ourselves to creating a friendly, comfortable environment that is predicated on helping each other achieve their personal best that day. We are not competetive and WOD times are only to gauge improvement.

Will you and/or your athletes be competing in the Open this year?

I hope to have about 15-20 people testing their skills in the Open this year for the first time. I am excited to see what I can do this year after testing the waters last year. This year will be more of a trial year since we’re only a year old gym and most are still trying to grasp the fundamentals of CrossFit.

Have you ever cheated on a WOD?

No way, this is an absolute disgrace to what we stand for. I make sure I no rep myself on all moves and would never cheat on a WOD or a rep scheme.

What's your 2013 CrossFit goal and what are you doing about it?

To be proficient at bar muscle ups and pistols. I’ve been working on chest to bar pull ups and ring muscle ups for my bar muscle ups and doing lots of ankle mobility for my pistols.

What are the common signs of overtraining and how do you handle this with your athletes?

We haven’t had any overtraining at our gym because we keep a good line of communication between the trainers and our members. We also recommend rest days and make sure people stay on top of recovery.

What’s the most common mistake you see among new athletes?

Peoples knees folding in like a cheap tent on squats.

If you could give someone new to CrossFit just one piece of advice, what would it be?

Show up and hold yourself accountable for your routine.

Would you share with us your favorite tip or cue that we might find useful to use in our training?

When doing muscle ups your doing the biggest hip extension you’ve ever done then doing the fastest sit up you’ve ever done ending in a tight ball.

What was your last cheat meal and on a scale of 1 to 10 how good was it?

I cheated with a local frosty/burger place and it was a 10. Double bacon cheeseburger, fries with lots of mayonnaise sauce and an ice cream.

Do you have any success stories among your athletes you’d like to share?

We had a member who walked in a hundred plus pounds overweight and could hardly get up and down a few times. This member now comes 6 days a week and can do burpees at a consistent pace, squat full depth and is starting to lift a good amount of weight. It’s amazing to see the transformation of his body and how much better he moves in all aspects of life.

Thanks for sharing Kyle. Best of luck with the growing community at Anderson River CrossFit!

Find out more:
(w) www.andersonrivercrossfit.com
(t) 530 945 8228
(e) andersonrivercrossfit@aol.com
FB: AndersonCityCrossFit

Monday 25 February 2013

Priceless

CrossFit Membership: $200

24 Reebok CrossFit T-Shirts: $600

Nanos to match each shirt: $2400

Kicking back after a WOD with a freshly shaken Progenex: Priceless.

There are some things in life money can buy.

For everything else, we’ll CrossFit.

Sunday 24 February 2013

Scream it like you mean it

There’s nothing wrong with grunting.

Some grunt because they are suffering under heavy loads. Others just like the dramatic effect.

Grunting is not the problem.

It's those 'noises' that are the problem.

Half assed whimpers, distressing high pitched weeps, doleful whines, feeble wails and orgasmic moans.

What the hell is that noise you’re making?

There’s nothing wrong with grunting.

But, for the love of god people, give it some oomph!!

Scream it like you mean it!

Let me hear you RWARRRRRRRRR!!!

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